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It’s no secret that many of the world’s greatest patriarchs are also preeminent flatulators. But rarely do we appropriately label or celebrate these kings of cheese cutting. Instead, we merely groan our disapproval or engage in passive-aggressive sabotage against our gaseous persecutors. It’s high time we end this behavior and extend an olive branch of acknowledgement. Here’s to celebrating Father Flatulence, Captain Cut the Cheese, Daddy Dirtblower, Old Man Mudbutt, or whatever distinguished title he carries in your household.


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